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Love is not always a walk in the park. Either we never find love, or when we do find it, it’s hard to keep it together.

The reality of relationships is that the feeling of love will eventually fade away. At the end of the day, love is determined not by your feelings alone, but with your commitment to the relationship. If you choose to love, you choose to work on it to make it last a lifetime. Here are ten things to keep in mind:

1) Be the right person to find yourself the right person

All our lives, we have always been on the lookout for the ‘right person’. Inside our heads, we already have a checklist on what our ideal partner should be like. But never did we position ourselves as the ‘right person’ to any human being for that matter, and that’s what we should strive to work on.

If you want to find true love, then you need to work on it.

2) Set your boundaries right from the start

Before committing in a relationship, ask yourself, ‘what would be the one thing I am not willing to overlook’? This will be your deal breaker. It is important to know this as early as possible to prevent an otherwise failed and short-lived relationship.

3) Maintain a healthy communication with your partner

A healthy communication with your partner is not built on a culture of nitpicking, blaming, and distrust. It is grounded on a loving and nurturing environment wherein you can freely express your feelings and thoughts no matter what.

4) Build your individual life, and shared dreams as a couple

In a relationship, it is important for each one to reach for his/her individual aspirations, and to support each other with whatever life goal the other is pursuing. Your relationship will not grow if it is only focused on your life as a couple.

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5) Be proactive in any relationship

Nothing will happen if you choose to be a passive spectator of life. Choose what you want and do not want in a relationship. Even in your circle of friends, you can always cut ties with the toxic ones. Remember that quality is greater than quantity.

6) Never see yourself as a ‘victim’

Refrain from victimizing yourself every time you encounter a huge fight with your partner just to get the sympathy of other people, or to feel better about yourself. You are in control of what is happening from your side. You either act upon it or you don’t.

7) Live with a purpose

In the bigger scheme of things, how do you see yourself living your life? Know your purpose and live your life in accordance with your goals.

8) Do not hurt your partner

It is inevitable that you will get hurt in a relationship because some things are way beyond your control. However, hurting your partner on purpose emotionally or physically shall never be one of these reasons.

9) Love unconditionally

You should learn to love not just the best but also the worst in your partner. You should love your partner for everything that he/she is and everything that he/she is not – from his/her deep-seated principle down to his/her general interests and hobby.

10) Love and be loved

In a healthy relationship, love is a cycle of caring and affection. When you shower your love to someone, you also deserve to be treated with the same love and respect.

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