13 real reasons spiritual awakenings break up relationships

There is no doubt that spiritual awakening works wonders. You ‘wake up’ and realize that you are connected to a higher power, after all.

But, as with all good things, spiritual awakenings can also spell doom – especially when it comes to relationships.

Before we explore these factors, let’s define the process first.

What is a spiritual awakening?

Also known as enlightenment or nirvana, it’s when you become more aware of your purpose and existence.

The process, which psychiatrist Carl Jung popularized, is all about ‘coming back’ to your original self.

It’s when you’re finally confident enough to answer the questions “Who am I?” and “Why am I here?”

What causes spiritual awakening?

Enlightenment can happen spontaneously. That said,  it often follows a life-changing event, such as:

  • Quarter or mid-life crisis
  • Major illnesses
  • Depression or anxiety
  • Dangerous accidents
  • Near-death experience

Any of these may force you to look at life from a spiritual perspective – essentially setting you towards the path of nirvana.

What are the stages of spiritual awakening?

Enlightenment doesn’t happen right in an instant. To finally reach nirvana, you’ll need to undergo these stages:

  1. The awakening itself. This starts with you clearing out some things in your life. You may find that your old belief systems – even relationships – don’t fit you anymore.
  2. The dark night of the soul. True to its name, it’s when you feel at your lowest. This is the time when your soul ‘recalibrates,’ essentially getting rid of all of your ego layers.
  3. The sponge. This is when you try and explore things that are more in tune with your spirit.
  4. The ‘Satoru’ self. Japanese for ‘comprehension,’ this is the time when you finally see your true nature. You begin to recognize all your skills, talents, and innate gifts.
  5. The soul session. This is the time when you make a lot of ‘trial and error.’ It will take you some time, but it’s the time your soul needs to grow and heal.
  6. The surrender. In this penultimate stage, you get to finally release the beliefs and thoughts that are keeping you back.
  7. Awareness and service. You’ve done it – you’ve reached nirvana! In this final stage, you realize your true purpose – and that’s being of service to others.

Why do spiritual awakenings end up destroying relationships?

Although enlightenment is a good thing, it comes with some consequences, particularly in relationships.

Here are 13 reasons why breakups often happen following one partner’s awakening:

1) You can no longer ‘connect’ with your partner

You and your partner share a unique kind of connection – that’s why you’re with them in the first place.

But once your spirit becomes enlightened, this divine connection will start to get loose (and worse, break up.)

For starters, you’ll find that your energies are no longer aligned. The connection you once shared with your partner? It’s as if it has gone with the wind. You may find that you’re no longer enjoying their company.

Before you know it, you’re out there ‘looking’ for someone who’s on the same energy wavelength as yours.

Sad as it may seem, but this ‘loss of connection’ can end up damaging your relationship for good.

2) Your beliefs have changed

As I’ve discussed, you’ll notice a change in your belief system once you start being ‘awakened.’ Unfortunately, this will not only affect you. It can shake your relationship dynamics as well.

Let’s say that you thought that it’s best to mind your business in your relationship. But after your enlightenment, you realize that it’s not healthy (newsflash: it never was.)

You’ve concluded that it only isolates you from your lover.

By and large, this will have a significant impact on your relationship. For starters, your partner may be used to doing their own thing.

Now that you’ve awakened, you realize the deep need to be empathetic. And, along the way, you may end up overwhelming your current partner.

This change in your belief system is bad – but it’s also good. You’ve become more empathetic, but you may lose your partner in the process.

3) Your priorities have shifted, too

When you experience spiritual enlightenment, you’ll finally discover your true sense of purpose.

Yes, it’s all good – but this often comes with a change of priorities.

Just think of this: before your awakening, you know that you want to marry your partner and have kids with them.

Then you attained nirvana.

Suddenly, you are faced with the need to travel the world and experience different cultures. It’s your life’s purpose, after all.

Of course, this would be hard if you were completely tied down.

No thanks to your awakening, your priority now is your life’s purpose – instead of your partner. Well, we know what’s bound to happen because of this.

4) You’re more intuitive

One of the best things about spiritual awakening is that it can make you more intuitive. Your third eye’s vision, which was once blocked, is now 20/20.

While this may be good for some relationships, it can spell destruction too.

For example, in the past, you may have had a gut feeling that your partner is cheating on you. But since you love them so much, you just decided to let it slide.

Now that you’ve attained, your intuition – apart from your spirituality – has become much stronger.

You can’t help but listen to your gut feeling now.

And, if you’re unlucky enough to be correct, this will give you the confirmation of what you knew all along.

5) You’ve become very curious

Apart from improving your intuition, your awakening will make you highly curious too. This may lead you to explore things in your relationships – things you may not have questioned before.

If you ask psychologist Jeffrey Davis, he’ll tell you that curiosity is good for relationships.

In his post, he explains that:

“Curiosity encourages positivity, engagement, and connection. Contemporary research suggests that curious people are more open to new social experiences, more willing to embrace uncertainty, and more capable of navigating difficult social situations.”

He further went on to explain:

“Not only did inquisitive people connect more deeply with others and express more positive emotions in describing their experience, but the results suggested that they may be better at reading social cues.”

But in real life, curiosity may end up destroying some relationships.

Just like intuition, your curiosity may lead you to discover some unsavory aspects in your partner. You may end up catching them in the arms of another, even!

In essence, this curiosity can end up making or breaking your relationship.

6) A gifted advisor confirms it

The signs above and below will give you a good idea about spiritual awakening and its ‘bad’ effects on relationships.

But a surefire way to know for sure is to speak with a real advisor.

The problem is finding someone you can trust.

There’s an abundance of fake “experts” out there but very few genuine advisors who can offer practical life advice.

That’s why I recommend Psychic Source. They provided me with a unique insight into where my life should go, including who I was meant to be with.

Having tried several online advisors, I think they’re the most caring, compassionate, and knowledgeable network of gifted advisors out there.
Click here to get your own personalized reading.

Not only will a genuine advisor tell you about spiritual awakening, but they can reveal all your love possibilities as well.

7) Your spirituality now comes first

Awakening doesn’t only make you change your relationship priorities. It will make you put your spirituality above all else.

For example, you may prefer meditating instead of spending some quality time with your partner.

At first, they may understand why you’re doing this. It’s for your self-fulfillment, after all.

But if you keep putting your spirituality over your lover, don’t be surprised if you suddenly find them walking away from you.

See, primary (romantic) relationships should be your priority.

As psychologist Suzanne Degges-White, Ph.D. explains it:

“When we see signs that something is claiming more of a partner’s time than in the past, or our partner displays increasing enthusiasm for a rival person or activity, or our partner is making choices that don’t prioritize the relationship or our desires or needs, the security of the attachment may begin to come undone.”

8) Your partner’s energy ends up draining you instead

When you undergo enlightenment, you change completely. You’ll find that your energy is not like it was before.

In fact, your partner’s thoughts and feelings – which are on a different (if not lower) level – may leave you feeling drained.

Well, this is what usually happens when you attain nirvana before them.

Since you’ve scaled greater heights, you’ll find that your energies are no longer in sync. Before, you managed to see eye-to-eye. Now, it’s become more difficult for you.

As a result, you’ll often feel fatigued after talking or being with them.  Needless to say, this energy drain – caused by your awakening – may cause an untimely breakup.

For starters, you may find yourself avoiding your partner more and more. And, as I’ve explained, you may even end up trying to find somebody whose energy matches yours.

9) You feel lonely – even if your partner is right beside you

You’re not supposed to feel isolated when you’re in a relationship, right?

Well, the opposite may happen once you get spiritually awakened.

As I’ve said, with enlightenment comes a ‘loss of connection’ with your partner. So even if they’re right there beside you, you still feel as if you’re alone in this world.

On top of that, your enlightenment may make you realize that you have a lot less in common with your lover.

Now that your soul has matured, the things you enjoyed doing with your partner don’t seem attractive anymore.

You find it boring – unfulfilling even.

This may all cycle back to the fact that your priorities have now changed.

Again, you may end up trying to break free. Worse, you may try to seek someone else – somebody who matches the high spiritual energy you now hold.

10) Your partner often misunderstands you

Another one of the downsides of spiritual awakening is a feeling of misunderstanding.

And it’s not just limited to your partner – you may feel this whenever you’re with family and friends as well.

See, being enlightened means your views and feelings have changed. And if your partner hasn’t gone through the same phase, they’ll find it hard to understand what you’re going through.

Even if they’re an open-minded person, your energies won’t match.

They’ll listen to you, sure, but it won’t be the same as talking it out with a similarly enlightened person.

This ‘misunderstanding’ may then prod you to find somebody else – someone who understands the journey you’re currently undertaking.

11) You become frustrated

Spiritual awakening can make you feel misunderstood and lonely. The result? A whole lot of frustration with your relationship.

You can’t help but wonder, why isn’t your partner as enlightened as you are?

Sure, your goal here may be to make them feel as ‘free’ as you are. But as you see, it’s something that you can’t force upon them.

If they want to be enlightened, they must take the necessary steps towards spiritual growth. And, even if they say they’ll try to, there’s no guarantee they’ll achieve nirvana at all.

If you wish to gain more clarity on this, I’d suggest speaking to a gifted advisor at Psychic Source.

I mentioned them earlier. They have helped me out in the past, and I’ve always found them honest and compassionate in their readings.

So instead of trying to solve all your love problems on your own, speak to an advisor who’ll give you the answers you’re looking for.

Click here to get your own personalized reading.

12) The relationship no longer feels the same

You can compare spiritual awakening to discovering your partner cheated on you. Because you now know the entire truth, your relationship will no longer feel the same.

It’s as if you’re a completely different person (well, you are.)

Before you know it, doubts that you didn’t know you had will start to kick in. You can’t help but question yourself.

Are they aligned with your future goals?

Do you both share the same values? Maybe they were before, but it’s a whole different thing once you’ve reached enlightenment.

To make matters worse, you may end up asking this dealbreaker of a question: do you really want to be with them for the rest of your life?

13) Your partner no longer recognizes you

More often than not, it’s you, the spiritually enlightened person, who’ll try to find the way out.

That said, there’s always a possibility of the tables turning. Yes, it could reach the point where it’s your partner who’s asking for a time-out.

Like you, they too may get frustrated with the relationship.

Similarly, they may find it harder to ‘connect’ with you. They may feel just as lonely because you have isolated yourself from them as well.

If you feel misunderstood, there’s a chance that they feel misinterpreted for everything they do as well.

It doesn’t help that your priorities have changed too. At the end of the day, they may feel that things aren’t the same anymore.

Before you know it, the relationship you’ve worked so hard for has gone crumbling down.

What you should do

The fact of the matter is once you achieve spiritual enlightenment, your relationship is bound to change. The only question is will you push through it – or will you pack your bags or find another?

No matter what path you take, here are five things you need to do to make the whole journey more manageable.

1) Have faith in your spirit…

It’s normal to have doubts – especially if your spiritual growth has ruined your life (and close relationships.)

But as with all things, you need to have faith in the process.

See, spiritual growth is a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

It’s just that it happened while you were in a relationship with someone – someone who hasn’t achieved their own enlightenment yet.

Remember: things happen for a reason. The universe may have destined you to be with someone else.

2) …as well as your relationship

Faith is not only crucial for your spiritual growth. It’s pivotal for your relationship as well.

As psychologist Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D. explains it:

“When couples believe in one another and see their relationship as a place of comfort and a platform for growth, it makes moving forward much easier and almost everything more fun. The willingness to believe that you are with the right person for the right reasons may be the key to a happy relationship.”

The bottom line:

Have faith in yourself – as well as your relationship. If both of you are determined to make it work, there’s a big chance that it will!

3) Don’t give up

Love can be so full of disappointment and deception.

Experiences like this one are enough to make you give up on love for good.

I want to suggest that you hang on for just a moment longer. In fact, I want to offer a solution.

And the good news is that you have all the tools you need to do this right now, right where you are.

I learned about this from the modern-day Brazilian shaman Rudá Iandê. He taught me how the lies we tell ourselves about love are part of what traps us in situations such as this one.

As Rudá explains in this transformational free video, love is available to us if we cut through the lies that we tell ourselves.

We need to face the facts about spiritual awakenings and love.

The alternative is to end up in loveless relationships or endless dating frustration that only leaves us cold and empty.

The alternative is to be sunk in stagnant codependency and completely unable to resolve the aforementioned issues.

Rudá’s teachings showed me a whole new perspective.

While watching, I felt like someone understood my struggles to find love for the first time by offering an actual, practical solution.

If you’re done with wasting your time on a love that doesn’t work, I invite you to watch this short video and open your mind to new possibilities to guide you on the path to finding true love and intimacy.

Click here to watch the free video.

4) Change is the only constant thing

All relationships are bound to change. It’s the only thing in life that’s constant.

Psychotherapist Michael J. Formica sums this up beautifully:

“Everything in nature occurs in cycles, including human experience. If we bring this notion to bear, we begin to see that change is not only necessary but inevitable. With this in hand, we can then develop a sense of equanimity and balance — first in our daily lives, then within the scope of our larger experience.”

In other words, relationships can only get stronger or weaker with time.

If you’re determined enough to keep the relationship going – despite the mismatch of spiritual energies – it’s up to you. But if you decide to leave and look for someone else, again, it’s up to you.

Just as I’ve said, you need to have faith in the process. Changes are bound to happen, and unfortunately, these often occur after a spiritual awakening.

5) Communication is key

Say your enlightenment has made you feel lonely, misunderstood, or frustrated. Would you instead bottle up these feelings – or tell your partner about them?

As experts from the American Psychological Association would tell you: “Keeping concerns or problems to yourself can breed resentment.”

Add to that, psychologists believe that the “way you communicate with your partner is important and the negative communication patterns can harm the relationship.”

What they’re trying to say here is you need to forego terrible communication habits, such as yelling and criticizing. If you want to make things work, then make sure to listen to and understand your partner well.

Final thoughts

Hopefully, the signs above have helped you with your concerns with spiritual awakening and relationships.

But if there’s a part of you that still wants to know more, I recommend speaking to a genuine, professional advisor.

And there’s one company that I always end up recommending, Psychic Source. Not only did they blow me away with their accurate readings, but they were also kind and understanding of my situation.

So if you’re tired of wondering about spiritual enlightenment and its effects on relationships, get in touch with a legit advisor. Take your future into your own hands! I did, and I’ve never looked back since.

Click here to get your own professional love reading.

Confused about what to do next?

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It may tell you exactly what you need to know.


Raychel Ria Agramon

Raychel Ria Agramon

Raychel Ria Agramon, RN (PH & US), MPM I'm Raye, a nurse licensed in both the Philippines and the US. I also have a Master's degree in Public Management. Just like helping my patients, I like to empower & motivate readers with research-backed articles.

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