When you dream about someone, are they thinking about you?

“A dream uninterpreted is like a letter unopened.”

~ Ancient Proverb

Are you constantly dreaming of the same person? Are you worried what it might mean? Ultimately, does it mean anything?

Maybe you’ve never dealt with dream interpretation before because you thought it was just hocus-pocus. Perhaps you were simply afraid that you might learn something startling. According to my own experience, dreams often reflect our unconscious feelings, and their meaning is worth exploring further.

After all, we use our dreams to process whatever happened to us recently.

In this article, you will find out exactly what your dreams are all about and why you have them!

Let’s talk about dreams

Did you know that the average person has about two to five dreams per night?

I’ve been a vivid dreamer since before I can even remember. I’ve had lucid dreams of intergalactic wars that left me drained for days. I’ve had healing visions that gave me hope when my untrained mind was spinning out of control. The same recurring scenarios sneak into my dream world whenever I am facing a major crisis.

My younger self often tried to shake off most of these baffling messages, especially if they arrived in the form of nightmares.

Thankfully, my intuition whispers differently these days. Instead of being foolishly ignorant, I now consciously choose to wonder: what does this really mean?

I like to remind myself that dreams are influenced by experiences, sounds and sensations. Who hasn’t dreamed of an alarm clock that woke you up? Unfortunately, you probably overslept because the real alarm clock wasn’t real to you at that moment.

Dreamers experience a distorted version of places and events. Our relationships with people can often appear bizarre. It is only when you wake up that you realize that you’ve been dreaming.

Ultimately, these are all complicated neurobiological mechanisms. The most realistic dreams occur in the REM phase, in which sensory impressions and information are processed. But what does it mean when we dream of real people that we recognize?

Are they thinking about you?

Sometimes, a person will think of you. You will feel it. You will know it without a doubt.

Through the eye of life, we create numerous emotional, spiritual, and personal relationships. Many of them are characterized by an incredibly strong connection that is manifested through feelings.

If your relationship is cherished, you will receive spiritual feedback in the form of emotions. Perhaps you will also get the impression that a particular thought didn’t arise in your own consciousness.

Relationships between soulmates, twin flames, and empaths often carry telepathic and psychic components, but not all connections are this strong.

When someone thinks of you, energy flows your way. A certain area of the brain is briefly activated, and you’ll get that little ping. Computers communicate with each other similarly, by sending messages like: “Hey, are you still there, can I send you some data?”

While we aren’t exactly machines, we still have a mental inbox. Listed below are some surefire ways for you to know whether someone misses you dearly:

A wave of unexpected feelings

If someone thinks of you, unexpected emotions will appear, most often feelings of emptiness and loneliness. A sudden sense of great longing may appear even if you are in a good mood. It’s very likely that someone is thinking about you at that very moment. These emotions materialize due to the energy vibrations transmitted by the person you are spiritually connected with.

Connection in dreams

If you often dream of a person with whom you are currently separated or have nurtured a relationship with them in the past, it’s possible they are thinking of you. It is believed that some energy vibrations can’t reach you while you are conscious, and so they end up manifesting in your nocturnal visions instead.

Magical synchronicity

Synchronicity is the main sign of a spiritual connection with someone, so don’t be surprised if you meet one person suddenly and often in unexpected places at unexpected times. It’s possible that this person often thinks of you, and therefore your energies become incredibly attracted.

So, what does it mean when you dream about someone? Are they thinking about you?

Friedrich Hebbel once said that dreams are the best proof that we aren’t as tightly locked in our skin as it might seem. Intuitively, you know that there are different meanings to everything that appears in your mind, even when you are sleeping soundly.

As a result, you may be wondering: “Do I dream about my ex-boyfriend because he’s thinking of me or is this a message from my subconsciousness? Is it a review for myself or do I just think of somebody because they also think of me?”

If you haven’t processed things in your life, they will inevitably appear in your dreams at some point. While dreaming, the amygdala, which is responsible for the feelings of a person, is a lot more active than in the waking state.

Emotions that tend to be in the background during the day are called up and processed at night. Certain objects or actions can be traced back to these emotions. To put it bluntly, your brain likes good organization, so it works hard to put everything in the right drawer. Even if you don’t…

Determine what type of dream you had

When you dream about someone there are a few different types of dreams you can have. The one that requires the least discussion is the fact that a dream is just a dream. You can usually tell these apart from the others, because while you are dreaming about someone, you won’t have any feelings for them, especially after waking up.

In such a dream, several people will likely appear, your emotions towards them won’t be strong or overwhelming. This type of dream will feel more like a movie than an experience. In fact, poignant films can also influence your nightly visions.

Dreams about a person can sometimes simply mean that you’ve dealt with this person more intensively in some way. They are often associated with situations that beset our thoughts. If the person is directly related to an action that has evoked certain emotions, then this is processed in the dream world and experiences are drawn from this.

In case you’ve been stressed at work and don’t know whether you’ll keep your job, it’s no wonder that your boss keeps coming up in your dreams.

If, on the other hand, a person appears in your dreams who isn’t in direct connection with what you’ve experienced the day before, this can be interpreted in different ways.

There are a few questions that you can ask yourself to determine what type of dream you’ve had and what it could mean in relation to the person that appeared in it.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Were you alone with this person?
  • Did you feel an emotional attraction to this person?
  • Did these emotions linger after you woke up?
  • Did you feel that this person had strong feelings for you?
  • The next time you saw this person, did you feel like those emotions were still there?

If you answered yes to any or all these questions, then it’s more likely that your dream has meaning beyond a random collection of thoughts and experiences.

Connection in dreams: Put your relationship with the person in order

So, to understand why you dream about a certain person, you need to ask yourself how you relate to them.

Dreams reflect information from your subconscious. Dreamers see and feel differently than when they are awake. You meet living people at night because they are part of your thoughts. It doesn’t matter whether you keep in touch with the person or just know them briefly.

What matters are the experiences and emotions you develop towards the person. Oftentimes you won’t consciously notice this. However, your subconscious stores the whole caboodle, so your brain must work late shifts to establish order.

Try to think about the following:

  • Do you only know the person briefly?
  • Is it maybe your ex-partner?
  • Do you dream of your current partner?
  • Is the person that appeared in your dream your friend? Or perhaps a relative?
  • Did you see someone from your childhood while you were asleep?
  • Is this person somebody who caused you great pain?

You must be able to interpret your relationship with the person.

Find out how you relate to them. Is it more of a friendly nature or is the relationship based on passion, attraction or even frustration, despair, or disgust?

This plays an important role in the interpretation of your dream.

Why we dream of a certain person: 4 different reasons

When a person appears in your dreams, it can have different meanings.

Dreams have always been mystical, but they are vital for human beings. You not only process what has happened, but also challenge your subliminal self.

People dream every night, and those who believe in dreams, believe that everything happens for a reason and that everything can be interpreted and explained. So, when a certain individual rolls into your dreams, it certainly has a deeper meaning worth analyzing.

1) They represent positive or negative traits

Do you have dreams of a person from the distant past with whom you no longer have any connection? Try not to disregard these memoirs, because they usually personify you as a whole or at least, one part of you.

Psychologist Carder Stout argues that when we dream about friends or relatives, it’s not about the person per se, but rather about their most distinguishing personality traits. For example, someone you recognize as exceptionally modest can show up in your dream world. This usually means that you are absentmindedly thinking about your own gentle side.

In a similar way, we can also have nightly visions of a person who possesses certain negative traits that bother us. Perhaps we possess them ourselves but would like to make a change.

2) Your brain finds connections

What does it mean if you dream of previous romances or even ex-partners? Do you secretly wish them back?

Psychologist John Mayer gives a clear clarification regarding dreams of people we haven’t seen for years. In an interview with “Elite Daily” he said that it’s very likely that you recently spotted somebody who resembles your old partner or friend. These can be faces you’ve seen in person or on TV. You probably didn’t take notice of this, but your brain stored these clues anyway.

3) Your soulmate is really thinking of you

If you are lucky enough to share a strong spiritual connection with somebody, just thinking of each other will produce a rush of electricity through a shared link. This information can have a strong effect on either of you, arriving in the form of intuition and unexpected dreams.

In practice, this means that when your twin flame or soulmate thinks of you, they often start appearing in your dreams. Messages can be received from within the spiritual realm, but also from within ourselves.

4) There is an underlying romantic interest

It is probable that you have developed a natural romantic attraction for a certain someone. Did it feel like you were together in your dream or might be in the future?

Try to talk to the person and just let things take their natural course. It’s also possible that you fancy them romantically, but you’re unsure if the feeling is mutual. You dream of being with them as this is a way to inhabit your fantasies. If this is the case, perhaps you should consider and explore your own emotions.

Consider the content of your dream

Have you ever had a dream where you were in someone else’s building, but you felt certain that it was your own home? Or perhaps you were talking to a stranger, but knew for sure that it was your father?

Such situations can be difficult to realize even within a dream, but your nightly visions are not subject to the same laws as the real world. You often have memories of things that you haven’t experienced, and you often know information that you’ve never received before.

This is because we inwardly try to resolve unsettled conflicts – such as the reason for a separation. A dream about your ex can also mean you are simply longing for love. If you are currently single, it can indicate that you are missing something interpersonal and that you crave for security.

It is believed that dreams are largely reflections of subconscious thoughts, so you need to try and interpret their essence to the best of your abilities. How do you achieve this?

Below are some relevant guidelines:

1) Dreaming of friendships

If you are dreaming about someone, it could be an indication that you want to expand your current relationship with them.

  • Did you help this person achieve something?
  • Did you show gratitude?
  • Did you feel happy or excited about expressing such feelings?

It is likely that you want to develop a friendly relationship with this person. You might sense that this desire isn’t mutual, and you wish to change that even if you aren’t consciously aware of it per se.

Dreaming of friendships tries to draw attention to these sentiments. By realizing them and being around that person, you may feel more comfortable and balanced.

2) Dreaming of saying goodbye

We often dream of farewells. Again and again, we have that one moment in our minds where we keep saying goodbye to somebody.

These recurring separations can occur if the person dreaming is afraid of losing someone. It is not uncommon for weddings to be associated with farewells. When someone close to us moves away after getting married, we know in advance they will be less around.

You most likely have a deep emotional connection with that person, and you suffer from a fear of loss. If you can’t imagine life without them, you will besiege your own mind with farewell-centered dreams.

3) Dreaming of love

Did you get out of bed with a big grin on your face? You float in your thoughts all day and think about the sweet dreams from last night. When you fall in love again, you usually won’t notice it right away. You may know that someone has piqued our interest, but whether more can develop from it is still questionable.

If so, it is possible that your subconscious has picked up some body language or condition that suggests that this person has strong feelings for you, especially the romantic kind.

Unintentionally, you might be suppressing certain feelings because you think you are still not ready for a new relationship, that it is the wrong man again, etc. But when they appear to you in a dream, you slowly become aware that the butterflies will soon start to flutter.

When you develop feelings for someone, dreams of that person can be triggered by your subliminal psyche noticing details that your conscious mind missed.

It is also possible that this person is thinking of you or dreaming about you and so a spiritual connection has arisen through the dream.

But what does it mean when you dream about someone in a negative way?

4) Nightmares

Nightmares are what young and old fear. A nightmare doesn’t leave anyone indifferent, especially if it keeps coming back.

Sometimes nightmares are the only way to process certain experiences. For example, if you recently had a car accident and were seriously injured, this scene may well give you recurring nightmares that make you jump out of bed at night, breathless.

Nightmares arise in the second half of the dream phase, the so-called REM phase. At the beginning, you have a completely normal dream which then turns into a nightmare in the second half. Research by the Roman university “La Sapienza” has shown that a nightmare can even change the relationship we have with a loved one.

5) Notes on dangers

Many people think that just because they dream of their ex, they are having nightmares. The focus shouldn’t only be on the actors of your visions, but on the content as well.

Unlike your conscious mind, which misses or forgets most of what is going on in the world, your subconsciousness is incredible at picking up small details.

So, what does it mean if you dream about someone who possibly has negative emotions in store for you?

Well, usually this is a cautionary warning. Perhaps your subliminal self has picked up something, or perhaps a vibration has been carried through the spiritual realm.

According to personal experience, the best type of review is to meet with this person. Allow yourself to stay open-minded and just observe their vibe.

  • Do they seem sincere?
  • Do they seem hostile or angry with you?
  • Does your gut give you a warning when you’re around this person?

Give them time to show their real colors and then act accordingly. In the end, it could just have been a false alarm.

Nevertheless, I suggest keeping a dream journal. Note down everything you remember as soon as you wake up.

This will also help you learn the difference between normal dreams and nightmares. You need to be able to draw a clear line between these two, no matter who emerges in them. Try to interpret and find out if the content of your dreams reflects the invisible emotions within you.

When the same person appears over again

You dream of the same person for the fifth night in a row. Every day when you get out of bed you wonder why this character keeps reappearing.

The actions, the place and everything else might change from dream to dream, but the one person is always present.

Sigmund Freud once claimed that every dream represents a certain wish fulfillment. According to this interpretation, everything that appears in our minds while asleep has something to do with our own personality. In a book published in 1899, the Austrian neurologist insisted that we tend to suppress certain experiences, but over time we wish them in real life.

Thankfully, with the development of psychology and dream interpretation in general, it’s become clear that one can’t lump all dream symbols into one basket.

When we go into our fantasy world, we often have no idea what’s going on. Dreams are an effective way of subliminal information sharing. Especially if they are recurring.

If a person appears several times in a dream, and this happens for a few nights in a row, our cerebrum uses this for processing. Events and feelings are called and worked up again.

So, what does it mean when a certain someone emerges so often that you slowly get the feeling that they want to stay in your dream world forever? How should one understand this phenomenon?

As dream interpreter Laurel Clark explains it: “Dreams are messages from the subconscious. They tell us about what has happened, send signals and give feedback about our actions and thoughts.”

Honestly, dreams can be marvelous and fascinating – but sometimes also a little strange.

In an interview with the “Elite Daily” magazine, psychologist John Mayer compares the human brain with a computer. “When we go to sleep, the little computer begins to dig. It never stops working.”

According to Mayer, if a dream repeats itself, it’s most likely because you haven’t fully processed a certain topic in your head yet. In fact, around two-thirds of all people are said to constantly dream of the same thing when they go to sleep.

This is because these recurring individuals don’t represent themselves but symbolize an emotion that one is presently experiencing. So, please don’t panic if you keep dreaming of your beloved mother-in-law. Your brain may just be processing the stress.

If you constantly dream of the same person, you are probably in a situation where the characteristics of that someone are in the foreground with you. Try to analyze them.

Are they here to torment you? Do you criticize or perhaps admire these peculiarities?

Which one is it? Finding an answer will help you understand yourself and others better.

Namely, scientists explain that if you have reappearing nightly visions of somebody, it can symbolically mean that you and that person coincide in something.

  • You share a common quirk.
  • You want a particular quality which this individual possesses.
  • Perhaps you are in some conflict with a particular mannerism.
  • Perhaps you admire this person for their perseverance, courage, or success.
  • Perhaps you like how this person lives and would like to have that kind of life.

In a nutshell

If you want to get to the bottom of your dreams about a specific somebody and find answers to certain questions, my suggestion is to follow the sequence of these steps:

  • Firstly, ask yourself why you had this particular dream and sit with this thought for a while.
  • What connects you with this person and what feelings do you have towards them?
  • Check your dream for content.
  • Is there an underlying argument and can it be resolved?
  • Is a certain person frightening you?
  • Or are you in love and experiencing intense feelings?

After all, you process fear, conflicts, joy, and other emotions in your dream. Take advantage of these nightly events and start wondering what they mean.

And as Paracelsus, Swiss physician, alchemist, and philosopher once said: “The interpretation of dreams is a great art.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Confused about what to do next?

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It may tell you exactly what you need to know.


Nevena Glogovac

Nevena Glogovac

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