When we were young, we couldn’t wait to grow old and be an “adult.”
It turns out, being an adult doesn’t really mean we have control over everything in that happens.
In fact, everything seems to be getting more and more confusing. Love has become complicated. Achieving our dreams is really hard to do. And happiness seems more and more elusive.
The truth is: you can’t control everything in your life.
But you know what the biggest perk of being an adult is?
You get to make your choices. You can control how you react. And you can say “no.”
So if you want to live a good life starting now? Then you need to stop trying to control these 5 unhealthy things.
1. Other people’s approval
Society has programmed us to always seek approval:
From the grades you get in school to the number of likes on your social media posts. It seems like you care more about how other people think of you. You don’t even care if you’re actually happy or not.
Doing things that make you happy has become secondary to seeking approval from people who don’t even matter.
But at the end of the day, it’s your life. You’ll be the one living with the consequences. So those choices might as well be aligned to your wants and your definition of happiness.
2. Perfection in everything
Be it your body weight, your relationships, or your achievements—you need to stop trying so hard to be perfect.
You need to understand that you will never be someone who just magically has their sh*t together. You are a flawed, ever-evolving, emotional human being. Nothing in your life will ever be perfect.
I’m not saying everything will always be hard. Life is a beautiful journey. But realistically, you will always face challenges. That’s how you grow.
But you can be content. You can have a good life doing things that give you meaning and being surrounded by great, loving people.
Before you can do that, though, you need to let go of your desire to be perfect. You need to accept and love yourself for who you are—strengths and flaws included.
3. The need to always be right
Who likes the feeling of being wrong? No one. We think that being wrong makes us lesser human beings.
But in our strong desire to always be right, we stop learning. We stop being humble. We forget that we are vulnerable, too.
It may be hard to admit that you could be wrong, but it’s the only way you can live an open life filled with growth and deeper consciousness.
Being able to admit that you’re wrong is not a weakness. It is a strength. It’s like saying, “I may not know everything, but I am willing to learn.”
4. Being stuck in the past
The past is an amazing part of life that teaches us so many valuable things.
But’s that’s just it: You learn from the past, you don’t live in it.
You can’t undo anything that has already happened. Being stuck in a rut of regrets and a cycle of overthinking will only damage your well-being and happiness.
The best thing you can do is to make sure you learn from your mistakes, so you do better in the future.
5. Toxic people and environment
Why do we tolerate toxicity in our lives?
Here’s an answer that will slap you in the face:
Because you allow it.
You have toxic people in your life because you refuse to cut them off, even when they cause you more pain than happiness. You stay in toxic environments because you don’t believe that there’s something better out there.
But there is something better. There are better people.
If you want better relationships, you need to let go of the toxic people in your life. If you want a healthy and happy life, you need to remove yourself from any situation that holds you back.
You need to start realizing your own worth. Start believing that you deserve more, that you’re good enough.
Trust me, it will change your life.