25 devastating signs of betrayal in a friendship

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How often have you questioned your friend’s trustworthiness?

Have they taken advantage, sometimes by taking more than their fair share and other times through just plain disrespect?

Have their priorities changed and now it seems like everything’s all about them?

So, if you’re questioning whether your friend is more of a frenemy, here are 25 signs your friend might be letting you down.

25 signs your friend might be letting you down

1) They gossip about you behind your back

This is a big no-no!

You’re supposed to be able to tell your friend anything, knowing that you’re sharing things with them in confidence.

But, have you noticed that your intel has been “leaking?”

Also, do they exaggerate and spread rumors about you to others in your social circle? This is a huge red flag that you’re dealing with Judas Iscariot and not your best friend.

2) All take and no give

You know the type, the moment they need something from you they’re texting, calling, and visiting. As soon as they get what they want, it’s radio silence. You don’t hear from them.

But here’s the kicker…

When the tables turn and let’s say you need something, they make thousands of excuses why they can’t help you.

If this resonates, it’s a huge sign of betrayal. Friendships are a two-way street so if it feels like you’re trapped in one way, know that this person isn’t a friend, they’re simply a user.

3) They make snarky comments about you

Do the low-blows keep coming to the point where you feel hurt?

When you’re talking and laughing, they come in with a snarky comment that’s meant to hurt. These comments can be as simple as “you’re so annoying” or “you seem like you have nothing better to do”

As the saying goes, in every joke there is an element of truth so if your “friend” does this more and more, know that they’re not interested in a friendship with you.

But how do you deflect these negative comments and move on without letting them get you down?

Who do you turn to for help?

The problem is that there are far too many fake gurus out there ready to sell you on unrealistic and ineffective solutions for improving your life by becoming a “better version” of yourself.

They want you to meditate, radiate “positive vibrations” and visualize the life of your dreams. They say this will make it come true.

Here’s the crazy thing:

Visualization and positive vibes won’t bring you closer to your dreams, and they can actually drag you backward into time-wasting, idle fantasy, and frustration.

But it’s hard to distinguish between whats real and what’s fake when you’re being hit with so many Instagram influencers telling you how a special kind of yoga, diet, or incense will transform your life.

You can end up trying so hard and not finding the answers you need that your life and dreams begin to feel hopeless.

You want solutions, but all you’re being told is to create a perfect utopia inside your own mind. It doesn’t work.

I want you to turn off all the noise for a second and get back to absolute basics.

What are you here for?

Before you can experience a real change, you need to really know your purpose.

I learned about the power of purpose from watching Ideapod co-founder Justin Brown’s video on the hidden trap of improving yourself.

Justin used to be addicted to the self-help industry and New Age gurus, who sold him on visualization and positive thinking. It left him lost and confused.

That’s why he traveled to Brazil to meet the renowned shaman Rudá Iandê, who taught him a life-changing new way to find your purpose and use it to transform your life and everything around you.

After watching the video, I discovered my purpose in life and it completely busted through the issues I was having with loneliness and feeling useless. This new way of finding success by finding your purpose actually helped me to become more confident and purge the people from my life who weren’t doing me any good.

Watch the free video here.

4) They always talk about themselves

Self-absorbed much?

This speaks volumes about their character, so if your “friend” constantly talks about themselves it should be a huge red flag that they’re not really interested in being your best friend.

They’re more interested in self-importance than friendship and if they continue to do this, know that they might be on the verge of betraying you.

5) They don’t clap when you’re winning

Pay close attention when things are going your way.

A true friend will be over the moon for you when it comes to your successes, but if you notice your friend doesn’t seem happy for you, it’s a huge sign that they’re jealous of you and won’t think twice about throwing you under the bus.

6) They’re always quick to judge

Because they’re perfect right?

If your “friend” is quick to judge you, know that you shouldn’t be friends with them.

They’ll never see the good in you and will always be looking for the negative in you.

They’ll take any opportunity to put a black mark on your name.

7) They don’t have anything nice to say about others

This is a sign that they can’t be trusted.

This type of behavior is also a clear sign of their narcissism which is one of the biggest red flags for betrayal.

When someone can’t see the good in anyone else, it’s an indicator that they’re not trustworthy friends or acquaintances and could betray you at any moment.

And don’t forget, misery loves company so don’t stoop to their level.

8) You can’t be your authentic self around them

You can’t be yourself around someone who’s always judging and criticizing you nor is it healthy to be around someone who constantly criticizes you.

Someone who’s always trying to put a negative spin on everything you do is like farting against thunder because they’ll never see the good in you.

They’ll only see what they want to see, so if their opinion of you is never positive, know that it won’t change no matter how hard you try.

9) They don’t care about your problems (but you need to care about theirs)

This is a big red flag because if your “friend” doesn’t care about your problems, you shouldn’t be friends with them.

They’re not going to truly care about your problems and will probably make excuses why they can’t be there when you’re in distress.

You need to be able to trust that someone cares about your problems if you want them on your side, so if they don’t care about yours, know that they’re not on the right side of friendship.

10) They try to control what you do and say all the time

If your “friend” tries to control what you do and say all the time, it’s a major red flag because trust is one of the most important aspects of friendship.

You need to feel like you can be yourself around your friends, so if they’re constantly telling you what to do and what not to say, know that they’re not trustworthy.

They want to control you, not be friends with you.

Block, delete, and move on!

11) They are always in competition with you

Talk about keeping up with the Joneses.

They always have to have something better than you.

Doesn’t matter if it’s a job, home, or new pair of sneakers, theirs always has to be better and more expensive than yours.

They are always competing with you for something and it’s never going to stop. If you’re only friends with someone who is always in competition with you, drop the friendship immediately because they don’t care about your happiness.

It’s probably because they’re insecure and jealous of you and want to belittle you.

12) They are always putting you down and making fun of you

If your “friend” constantly makes fun of you and puts you down, it’s a big red flag because they’re not being genuine.

They could be trying to get under your skin for a reason or just being mean for the sake of it. They’re not being genuine and if they’re constantly putting someone down, there’s no telling what their true intentions are.

If someone wants to put you down, there’s no telling how far they’ll go to make sure that happens.

I don’t know about you but I wouldn’t want that in my life.

13) They exclude you from events

There’s a huge party planned for this weekend and everyone’s invited, except you.

This can be incredibly hurtful to deal with.

This person hasn’t invited you because they want to hurt you.

When you confront them about it, they say something like “I didn’t think it was your vibe”, or “I wasn’t sure if you would come”, knowing full well you would have loved to be there.

If this rings true, they are telling what their true intentions are.

Save yourself the disappointment and find new friends.

14) They always cancel plans and bail on you

You’ve been dying to go to Ed Sheeran’s concert. You’ve booked tickets months ago and then it happens. Your friend bails on you at the eleventh hour.

A true friend will go the extra mile for you and will value what you find important. If they can shrug you off in the blink of an eye, it’s a prelude for bigger betrayals down the line so save yourself the heartache and call it off.

You deserve way better.

15) They always want the last wor

A true friend is someone who’s not afraid to be wrong and will admit it when they are. They won’t try to make you feel bad about what you said, and they’ll let you speak your mind.

If someone always wants the last word, it’s because they’re trying to control the conversation and make sure that you don’t speak your mind.

If someone can’t handle your opinion, there’s no telling how far they’ll go to make sure that you don’t say anything that could hurt them.

Ain’t nobody got time for that!

16) They’re always rude!

Does your friend always have a nasty attitude?

If so, it’s because they’re insecure.

There are some people out there who are just naturally rude and mean but if your friend is constantly being rude, it’s a sign that they could be looking for a reason to get mad at you later on. They could be trying to make you uncomfortable or really just aren’t very nice people in general so steer clear if this is all too familiar.

I mean, you don’t want to be associated with someone who acts like a complete douche, do you?

17) They’re highly critical

Do they always seem to be pointing out all your flaws?

Does your friend enjoy bringing up your insecurities and do they make a point of highlighting the things that you aren’t that good at?

If so, then this is the biggest red flag that you can go off of. If your friend is bringing up your flaws and putting them in front of everyone, then it’s not a good sign for your future friendship.

It’s incredibly toxic behavior and you should distance yourself at once.

18) They constantly try to make you feel bad about yourself

A true friend will always try to put a positive spin on things and will never criticize or make fun of you for your mistakes or weaknesses.

They’ll listen and help you figure out what went wrong and how to fix things when something goes wrong instead of making fun of you for having been burned by something before.

If someone constantly tries to make you feel bad about yourself, it’s because they’re insecure. Not everyone is as confident in themselves as you are, but that doesn’t mean that they have to bring it up whenever the opportunity presents itself.

That’s bad friend behavior right there and you don’t need that.

19) They enjoy watching you fail

Talk about a frenemy!

A true friend is someone who will be there for you, even if it means going through something hard with you before you finally succeed.

They always seem to know when you fail and usually don’t laugh at you or make fun of you when something goes wrong, so that’s a red flag for their true motives.

20) They don’t respect your boundaries

A true friend will never ask you to do something that you don’t want to do or take advantage of your being in a vulnerable state.

It’s always better for you to have boundaries and not have people try to take advantage of you and put you in uncomfortable positions.

21) They complain about their life

Does your friend constantly bitch and moan about how bad they have it?

The point is…

A true friend will always seem to be happy, even if they’re going through hardship in their lives.

They’ll never complain about what things are like or complain about the way that their lives are now. A true friend will face all of their hardships head-on and won’t be complaining about it daily.

Be wary of staying around someone who constantly permeates negativity. That [email protected] is contagious!

22) You have a gut feeling about them

This might sound kind of silly, but if you have a gut feeling about a person, then it’s probably not a good sign.

That gut feeling is from your inner mind telling you that something isn’t quite right and that it’s not healthy to keep them around in your life.

Listen to your gut feelings and don’t ignore them because they’ll try to warn you when something isn’t right.

Like mom used to say when in doubt, leave out.

The thing with spirituality is that it’s just like everything else in life:

It can be manipulated.

Unfortunately, not all the gurus and experts that preach spirituality do so with our best interests at heart.  Some take advantage to twist spirituality into something toxic – poisonous even.

I learned this from the shaman Rudá Iandé. With over 30 years of experience in the field, he’s seen and experienced it all.

From exhausting positivity to downright harmful spiritual practices, this free video he created tackles a range of toxic spirituality habits.

So what makes Rudá different from the rest? How do you know he’s not also one of the manipulators he warns against?

The answer is simple:

He promotes spiritual empowerment from within.

Click here to watch the free video and bust the spiritual myths you’ve bought for the truth.

Rather than tell you how you should practice spirituality, Rudá puts the focus solely onto you. Essentially, he puts you back in the driver’s seat of your spiritual journey.

23) They never do anything nice for you

In fact, they didn’t even wish you a happy birthday.

A true friend will always go out of their way to do things for you without expecting anything in return.

They might do nice gestures like holding the door open for you or buying you a cup of coffee, but they won’t expect to be paid back.

On the contrary, they’ll be upset if you don’t return the favor at some point in time, so it’s definitely not a healthy relationship if they’re never doing any nice gestures for you.

24) They take advantage of you

A true friend will never take advantage of your good nature or generosity.

They will never ask you for too much and will always appreciate what you’re willing to give them.

They will never take advantage of your kindness or perhaps try to push you into doing something that you’re not comfortable with.

They’ll always be there for you when you need them, and they’ll never ask for too much in return.

25) They don’t stand up for you

Despite what you did or said, a good friend will always have your back and stand up for you.

They will stick up for you even if others disagree with you and will never stand down on your behalf. A true friend will never turn their back on you, no matter what.

Wrapping up

As you can see, there are a lot of things that should be looked into when determining whether a person is truly your friend or not.

Not everyone will be the perfect friend for you, but you need to learn how to spot the signs early on if you ever want to avoid having bad friends in your life.

It might take some time to build up a good relationship, but it’s worth it in the long run.

Can a gifted advisor help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to someone with special intuition.

I know this from personal experience…

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