Deeper than soulmates
An existential earthquake
My souls mirror.
– Alicia Keys
Nothing like a quote from Alica Keys to make you realize that there are more connections you can have in a lifetime than just your twin flame.
Your best friends…
Your current lovers…
You knew they were your twin flame when you instantly bonded and established one of the strongest spiritual connections the more you got to know each other.
You saw another version of you in them, felt like everything has fallen into place, then fell in love… even when they’re in a romantic relationship that isn’t with you. You start to think if you were better off before you met your twin soul.
So how do you deal when you can’t have what you thought was destined for you?
Keep scrolling for 17 critical tips to help you deal when your twin flame has a significant other.
1) Know that you glow on your own
You feel as if you’re not allowed to be whole when your “other half” is with another person. Your “soul’s mirror” shattered into tiny little pieces.
Heartache is one thing, but feeling heartache because of your twin flame, can make you forget that you’re one whole flame yourself. Sure, they may be the “other half of your soul”, but you’re still two individuals with separate lives.
It’s true that two flames can light up a bigger space, but know that you can grow your own wildfires too.
Remember how you have your own goals, your personality, and your values? That’s still you. Or have you forgotten about your friends and family? Because they still love you.
Keep your focus on what you always had, then grow (and glow!) as your own person from here on.
2) All is fair in love and leftovers
Ah yes, the classic tale of telling how there are no rules when you fall in love because it just so happens that there are some feelings so overwhelming that it gets difficult to act by the book—like thinking about someone else who is taken.
This goes the same with leftover lessons and experiences you gained from connecting with your twin flame. There are no rules written on how you should carry them, store them, or use them. And there are definitely no instructions that require you to throw them all away.
The lessons you learned as friends, the heartache that came along with it, the love that you received, take them all to heart and gift something better for your other connections and for yourself.
3) Get a real psychic’s confirmation
The tips above and below will give you a good idea of what to do if your twin flame is in a relationship.
But a surefire way to know for sure is to speak with a real gifted advisor.
However, I know how important it is to stay away from fake “experts”.
That’s why I recommend Psychic Source. They provided me a unique insight into where my life should go, including who I was meant to be with.
Having tried several online advisors, I think they’re the most caring, compassionate, and knowledgeable psychic network out there.
Not only will a genuine psychic tell you what to do in this situation, but they can reveal all your love possibilities.
4) Appreciation is key
There’s no use in resenting your other half after leaving you with a tsunami of emotions. Easier said than done, right? But truthfully, anger will only breed more negativity.
Why don’t you shift your mindset instead? Be grateful that you’ve even got the glorious chance to meet your twin flame and share something real, even as friends.
Appreciate what you had to set yourself free from what could have been for your relationship.
Set your sights on the little light that your connection created to keep you warm from the cold reality you’ll soon get through.
More critical tips coming your way, so don’t lose hope that you will get some sort of spark again.
5) Heal your burns
Don’t let the burns from your heartache leave you with scars because your pain can be treated.
How can they love someone else when you’re… their twin flame?
According to psychotherapist and love coach, Dr. Lisa Xochitl Vallejos, “Your job, as a twin flame, is to not focus on your counterpart but to focus on healing yourself.”
Your twin flame comes into your life to spark big changes and help you resolve inner conflicts you can’t do alone. And sometimes they only stay for a chapter or two to accomplish this.
6) Breathwork works
Play Breathin’ by Ariana Grande in the background and start focusing on your wellbeing.
Add mind exercises, quiet meditations, and breathwork to your healing routine. You’ll be surprised how taking a step back from reality and keeping your thoughts at peace can help you get back on your feet.
Assisted by your therapist, you’ll be taught how to focus on your body, your mind, and your breathing patterns. Your processes and needs are different from another person’s, so it’s always best to seek what works for you.
Slow huffs and slow puffs, my friend.
7) Trust in the Universe
The Universe played a big role in letting you both meet at the same time, in the same place, and in the right circumstances—even if it’s not particularly for romance.
Trust in the process you’ve gone through. Trust that there are reasons for meeting your twin flame, for establishing that connection, for going through a heartbreak, and for feeling languished.
Put your trust in the possibility that the Universe has something better in store for you.
8) Find your soulmate
While you’re waiting to see how things go with your twin flame, why not make sure that they’re really the one for you?
Let’s face it:
We can waste a lot of time and energy with people who ultimately we’re not compatible with. Finding your soulmate isn’t exactly easy.
But what if there was a way to remove all the guesswork?
I’ve just stumbled upon a way to do this… a professional psychic artist who can draw a sketch of what your soulmate looks like.
Even though I was a bit skeptical at first, my friend convinced me to try it out a few weeks ago.
Now I know exactly what he looks like. The crazy thing is that I recognized him right away,
If you’re ready to find out what your soulmate looks like, get your own sketch drawn here.
9) Ignite your own spark
How do you light up matchsticks? You press the match head onto the striker and drag it until fire appears. Then you do it all over again if it fails to light up.
You do it, you make it happen, you light it up.
And in life, remember that you can accomplish things on your own. You may fail and you may break, but remember that you always have a choice, a choice to shine on your own.
Realize that everything you have right now is all thanks to your decisions. Yes, opportunities came and people helped, yet ultimately, it was always because of your choices.
Remember, you’re still your own person… whether or not you’re with your twin flame.
10) Focus on abundance
At the end of the day, it always helps to count your blessings and to focus on abundance than linger on uncontrollable losses.
Create a gratitude list, remember your happy places, find your guilty pleasures—anything! Because anything that makes you feel good will keep you going.
And besides, your twin flame is still your twin flame, just not in the circumstances that you hoped it would be. And yet that’s still something to be grateful for.
Foster gratitude to receive more things to be grateful for. So prepare yourself for something greater than what you currently have.
11) Let go of the connection
Switch your mindset and perception because not all twin flames come into your life for romance.
Dr. Vallejos noted it as a toxic belief to think that twin flames only have romantic connections. She said that “twin flames do not come together for an epic love story; they come for a purpose.”
Believe in all other reasons why someone comes into your life so fittingly: friendships, lessons, a difference…
And there are also reasons why someone doesn’t stay in your life.
Unhealthy patterns could have been present between you and your twin flame’s relationship and that is never okay to overlook. Some of which include forced romances, co-dependence, and beliefs.
When the person you love is in a relationship and is making little to no effort to get out of it, let go and move on. Because you deserve someone that can see mutual romance happening between the two of you.
12) Build other spiritual bonds
Unlike a twin flame who is just a single person in this lifetime, soulmates can be many different people whom you can connect with.
Don’t block your heart from welcoming old and new people just because you already have “the perfect connection” with your twin flame. Remember, thinking how one person is the only reason for your true happiness is not love but co-dependence. Your twin is a catalyst, not your whole reason for living.
13) Find meaningful relationships
That regular customer at the coffee shop you’re working at, that apartment neighbor that always holds the elevator door for you when you’re rushing, that nice fella that hops off at the same bus stop as you…
There are probably plenty more possible relations, just not in the ways you’re used to.
Give yourself a chance to meet people outside of your strong and certain spiritual connections. Bond with people who aren’t your twin flame, your soulmates, etc.
This can help give you a wider view of the world, bigger than even your twin flame connection.
14) Keep yourself warm
You know, you can still keep your flame blazing with things that make you feel warm and cozy inside.
Imagine your Saturday night outs, your online package deliveries, your early clock out, your mom’s cooking—everything! There are so many reasons for you to stay warm aside from thinking about your twin flame’s significant other. So beware, overused reminders up ahead!
Focus on yourself, dear.
Your life won’t get any easier if you’re stuck asking questions about your twin flame’s love life. Your comfort food won’t get any sweeter if you’ve been feeding yourself with sour thoughts. Your hobbies won’t get any more enjoyable if you keep on remembering how you love the same things.
You loved plenty of things before knowing your twin flame loved them too, okay? And those made you happy way before you met your TF. Let those things make you feel happy again.
15) Stop romanticizing the perfect partner
I’m sure you’ve been told to not put anybody on a pedestal. You’ve probably heard it from a concerned friend, a lecturing parent, or even a rom-com movie. But what does that really mean?
It means only seeing and highlighting the positive values of somebody and denying them of their flaws. Yes, it is a pretty common thing to unconsciously do especially when you’re in love.
Looking at someone with rose-tinted glasses is quite dangerous because you’re ultimately seeing past through toxic signs that will slowly hurt you. Not to mention the pressure you put on them.
But in reality, twin flames can be one of the hardest relationships you can ever have. Considering you can understand and relate to all of their highs and all of their lows, all of their strengths and all of their weaknesses—it can be chaotic. Because of this, many people tolerate neglect, toxicity, and other damaging behavior in twin flame relationships.
So take off your rose-tinted glasses and take down your pedestals, because even if there may be unconditional love, there are no unconditional relationships. Twin flame or not.
16) Smoke out the obsession
It will take too much of your time opening too many tabs, looking for specific answers as to why they’re not meant for you. You’ll have to stop yourself right there.
A handful of articles, claims, and all-nighters will tell you the same things. There’s no use in denying that people should have the right to be free beings that can choose to love whomever they want to love. Spiritually connected or not.
Save yourself from unwanted pain brought about by imagining all of the “what-ifs”.
Again, happiness is not the by-product of your twin flame’s existence. Believing in that is codependency, totally different from connecting with someone. Love is meant to be liberating because attachment can be controlling.
So how to grow out of it? By stopping yourself once you start relating everything to your twin flame. Because when you do, everything little thing you bonded over will remind you of them and it’ll be hard to get over.
17) Fall in love with your purpose
Start by understanding the reason behind why the Universe brought you two together in the first place. Remember that twin flames meet to create a difference in each other’s lives. And that difference is everything that will give you a greater sense of self and direction—your purpose.
So the answer to your question? You fall in love with your purpose instead.
You fall in love with the lessons you gained, the things you finally understood about yourself, and the things you want to work for. Most of which, are things you probably already knew even before calling someone your twin flame, only meeting them made it clearer.
Hopefully, the points above will shed some light on what to do if your twin flame is in a relationship.
But if there’s a part of you that still wants to know more, I recommend speaking to a genuine, professional gifted advisor.
And there’s one company that I always end up recommending; Psychic Source. Not only did they blow me away with their accurate readings, but they were also kind and understanding of my situation.
So if you’re tired of wondering what to do about your twin flame, get in touch with a legit love advisor and take your future into your own hands. I did, and I’ve never looked back since.
Can a gifted advisor help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to someone with special intuition.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Psychic Source when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into what my future holds, and the confidence to make the right decisions when it comes to love.
If you haven’t heard of Psychic Source before, it’s a site where gifted advisors help people through complicated and difficult life situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a highly intuitive psychic and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my psychic was.