We all strive for authentic relationships, but in a world of social media and technology, these relationships are hard to find.
Even for those in open relationships.
We meet people on dating apps or Facebook, but these connections tend to lack a necessary dose of human intimacy.
You might work together with people in a crowded office building, but communication is mainly focused on work-orientated things.
You may be lucky enough to have friends and family, but these relationships are often taking a hit thanks to social media and our busyness.
So, the question is:
What does it take to create an authentic and meaningful relationship?
One of the biggest mistakes we make in our relationships is denying the truth. We deny the truth about how we really are. We deny our mistakes and how little effort we’re actually putting into our relationships.
The good news is, we can change. All of us can.
Right here, right now we can start by admitting that…
1) We naturally judge others
The first truth to note is how judgmental we all can be.
There is nothing to learn if we look at everything with a preconceived judgmental glance.
Why not take the opportunity to learn about the other person? Why not dig deeper and see the goldmine of information that is under the surface?
Our brains are wired to stereotype, but that doesn’t mean we can’t take a step back be more thoughtful.
Be ready to learn and listen because there is a wealth of information if you take the time to ask.
2) We focus on negatives
This is a universal truth for people who start to focus on a person’s weaknesses.
Relationships shouldn’t be about someone’s deficiencies because everyone has them. Instead, it is smarter to highlight their strengths and magnify them as much as possible.
You’ll avoid the toxicity that thwarts a relationship’s growth and value.
3) Everyone gossips
It’s easy to sit down and speak poorly of someone else. People do it all the time.
And if you do the same, people probably do the same about you.
But the truth is, it’s toxic and it isn’t adding anything to your life.
If you avoid gossip, you save yourself from drama and negative energy.
Many people forget this and give in to the short-term value gossip provides.
4) We all have flaws
Each person has three versions. The first version is what strangers see, the second version is what your loved ones see, and the last version is the real you. This version is the one only you are aware of.
You hide those flaws from everyone. You don’t let anyone in on them.
It doesn’t matter if they’re your parents, spouse, or child. They will never hear about those flaws.
This is why it is essential to look into opening up and sharing these important parts of your life. Being vulnerable allows true love to blossom. There’s nothing to hide, which gives room for the relationship to grow.
Imperfections are okay because everyone has them.
5) We Try To Fix Them
People often try to fix the other person. This can be something as simple as the clothes they wear or how they present themselves in public. However, it is essential to understand fixing them is not the solution.
It is important to accept them and learn to care for who they are as a person.
Growth will occur, and they will change, but it should never be forced. Organic change is far better and appropriate.
6) We Resist Change
A beautiful relationship is one where change will arise. This is a part of any healthy relationship, and that will never change.
If a relationship breaks apart because of this change, then that was bound to happen regardless.
Resisting change never makes sense and isn’t the route to take. It’s critical to accept this as reality.
7) We Care About Our Failed Relationships
Yes, your middle school girlfriend has something important to teach you. Every relationship brings with it a set of life lessons that carry into a future relationship. This continues forever and that will never change.
People grow, and you do care about your failed relationships.
Yes, you won’t hinge on them or look to speak to those people but the lessons you learned remain in your mind forever. They become a part of who you are.
8) We Take Many Things Personally
It can be something simple, but it can start to dig a hole in your mind. Many people take things personally and then mull over them for days, weeks, or years. It can lead to a sense of dissatisfaction and constant worry depending on what you have taken personally.
This is why it becomes necessary to ignore what others are saying and focus on oneself.
These are the important relationship truths people are unwilling to admit whether it’s with their significant other or someone else.
Relationships take time to build and appreciate, but these truths remain. It is important to accept them and realize change starts here.
These truths don’t have to be your truths as long as you accept them and make appropriate changes to your mindset.